De Burds in de Bees
by Firewalker711
Summary: This is definitely an inevitable part of having three daughters! Dealing with the time of the month! Actually. . .I've imagined this for quite some time. With Margo being the oldest one, it was just a matter of time before that happened!


_Welcome to true parenthood, Gru! Another milestone you have to face! Puberty!_

"Hello, dad?"  
"Margo?" Gru asked, looking at his watch. "It's only 11:00am. Why you calling so eurly?"  
"Can you come get me from school, please?" Beginning to grow a little concerned, he asked,  
"Why? Did something happen?" Now he noticed some hesitancy over the phone. Then a heavy sigh. "Yeah. You might say that."  
That's when out of nowhere another woman's voice replied, "Mr. Gru?"  
"Speaking?" Gru replied, growing more alarmed by the minute.  
"This is the nurse from Margo's school." Again he heard some hesitancy, then she replied in almost a whisper. "You're daughters fine. But she started her first menstrual cycle, and she's not feeling very well. . ."  
Upon hearing this, Gru could feel all the blood drain out of his face. Letting out a low groan, a hand slowly rubbed over his eyes.  
"_Ohhh_, boy . .Eet _starts_. . ." he whispered in a cracked voice.  
"Your daughter's here with me in the first aid room, just a few doors down from the principles office."  
Clearing his throat he nodded, "A'right. . .I'll be dere in a meenute."

Grabbing his keys, Gru quickly headed to the door in a fast pace. Flinging it open, he wasn't surprised to find his mom standing on the doorstep. She did this to him often. Showing up unexpectedly without any warning, often interrupting Gru while he was in the middle of an important project. But on this occasion, her timing couldn't have been more perfect.  
"Mom. . .I'm glad you're here. But I can't talk now. I have an emergency."  
Not even concerned over what it was, Marlena merely shrugged her shoulders and mumbled,"_Ehh_. . .So what else is new." And continued to walk inside the house.  
Knowing good and well she wasn't going anywhere, Gru quickly took off for the school, not sure exactly what he would face.  
**Moments later. . . **  
Upon his brief arrival he quickly strode down the hall, turning left until he saw the nurses station. Gently rapping on the door, he stuck his head in just a bit. "Hello? Anybody here?" Now Gru stopped when he saw Margo sitting in a chair across from him. "Oh. . .dere you are. . ." he lightheartedly replied. That is. . .until she looked up at him with one of the most depressed looks he'd ever seen. It had him momentarily silenced, trying to figure out what to say to her. After all. . .this was a very delicate situation. "So. . .How you feeling?"  
Folding her arms, Margo looked away and snapped.  
"_Humiliated_!" Letting out a heavy sigh, Gru shook his head and replied,  
"Yeah? Well you're not de only one. . ." At that moment the school nurse came out the office, giving him a kind smile. "Hi, Mr. Gru. . ."  
"Hello. . ." he muttered, watching as Margo stood up and grabbed her schoolbag off the bench. At the same time the nurse replied,  
"I gave her an extra sanitary napkin. She's got it in her schoolbag. But she'll need to stop and pick up some more. Ok?" Cheeks red with embarrassment, Gru gruffly muttered, "Oook. . ."  
Seeing how mortified he was, she lightly chuckled,  
"Hey. . .it's alright. You're little girl is just growing up, that's all. . ."  
"_Growing up_?" He scoffed. "She's only _eleven_! I can't believe dis is happening so soon."  
"Oh. . .Some girls start as early as _nine_." She stressed, as Gru slowly shook his head. "So you're lucky." Inwardly wanting to disappear, he rolled his eyes and muttered,  
"Oh, yeah. I'm just about de luckiest man in the wourld!"

The drive to the shopping center was silent. Although Gru desperately wanted to talk to Margo, he just couldn't think of the right words to say. And in some ways, he didn't know if that was helping the situation. . .or making it worse.

When they walked inside of the drugstore, Gru handed Margo a ten-dollar bill. Then forced himself to ask, "Umm. . .Do you need any help?" Inwardly wanting to faint over the idea of her dad walking with her through the maxi section, Margo quickly blurted,  
"No! I can do it. . ." And jetted off down the isle before Gru had a chance to do anything else.

**Several minutes later. . . **

Picking up her cup of tea, Marlena walked out the kitchen just in time to catch Gru and Margo stepping through the front door. Silently she watched as Margo headed straight to the bathroom, tightly holding a shopping bag against her chest. At the slam of the door, Gru hopelessly gazed up at the ceiling, and sighed. Pretending like she didn't notice, Marlena began to head for the living room. It wasn't too long after when she felt Gru following her, until the two of them were alone. Closing the double doors behind him, Gru leaned up against them and groaned. "_Mooom_. . .I've got a situation."  
"You always do, son. But what is it _dis_ time?" She said, pretending to be nonchalant. But on the inside she was worried that Margo was in some kind of trouble. She watched as Gru nervously fidgeted, as though trying to find the right words. "It's about Margo. . .she uhhh. . .You know. Got de _woman's' thing_." Realizing what he meant, Marlena found herself chuckling with relief.  
"Oh? Is _dat_ all? Well, she's a gurl, you know. You can expect dat."  
Annoyed with her sarcasm, Gru irritably replied, "Well, I'm _not_ a gurl! And I don't have a clue how to handle it! Dats why I need you to talk to her for me. " Thinking it over for a minute, Marlena found herself shaking her head with defiance.  
"No. . ." She firmly replied. Stunned, Gru could only marvel at her with disbelief.  
"_No_?! B-but mom I-"  
"It's not my place, son. You're her father. Dat's _your_ job."  
Inwardly beginning to panic, Gru stammered, "But I-I don't know what to say to her!"  
"You're not _dat_ dumb. . ." Marlena coolly replied, "I'm sure you'll tink of something."  
Completely flabbergasted, Gru folded his arms like a small child.  
"No, I won't! Because I'm _not_ doing it!" he huffed in frustration.  
Used to her son's antics, Marlena gave him a look of disapproval.  
"Fine. Then when she has a _baby_ later on down de line, you'll be de one taking care of it!"  
It was as though hearing this snapped him back into reality. Eyes widening, he gasped, "Mom. . what are you trying to do? Give me a heart attack?!"  
"No. . .I'm just stating de facts. Dat's all. Margo is changing now, whether you like it or not. And when she gets older, she'll tourn to her friends instead of you for advice." She stated, as a troubled expression crept over Gru's face. "Dat is why you should talk to her, while she's still willing to listen."  
"Yeah? _How_?!" Gru vented with frustration. "You never discussed dat subject with me. _Ever_! I had to leurn everything on my own!"  
"But you steel have a lot to fall back on. . ." she interrupted. "And you had enough sense not to populate de planet with your own children, or break de hearts of women." She stated, as Gru marveled at her with disbelief."You always kept to yourself, after all dese years. . .Your reasons being your own. But. . . you're steel setting a good example, whether you realize it or not." She emphatically stated, catching the marred expression on her son's face. This caused her gaze to soften a bit. "You're child needs you, Gru. Don't deny her, de way I denied you."

**Later that evening. . . **  
After picking Edith and Agnes up from school, Gru kept them occupied by allowing them to play games with the Xbox 360. This in turn had him looking for Margo, who managed to keep herself as far away from the ruckus as possible. Not that he blamed her. She'd been through enough for one day. He hadn't searched long, when he found her sitting at the kitchen table doing her homework. Out the corner of her eye, she saw him slowly emerge through the double doors. This had her looking up to catch the worried expression on his face.  
"Uhh. . .Am I interrupting?" he asked.  
"Actually. . .no. . ." She answered, pushing her math book aside. "I'm having trouble with a problem. Can you help?" Having excelled at any type of math, Gru smiled with enthusiasm.  
"Sure. . ." He said, now scooting over next to her in the booth. "What are we doing?"  
"Fractions. . .I'm trying to catch up on what I missed today at school. . ."  
"Don't worry. . .We'll figure it out." he replied, noticing the sober look on her face. Unable to help himself, he cautiously asked, "You feeling any better?"  
Looking up at him, Margo sighed and mumbled, "Just a stomach ache. . .that's all. . ."  
"Oh. . ." Gru replied, watching as she leaned back and folded her arms. Little did he know that she wanted to confide with him so badly, but didn't know where to start. For Gru this made the situation even more awkward. So much so, that he couldn't take it anymore. Eyes rolling upward, he shook his head.  
"Look Margo. . . I know dese _changes_ are hard for you. It isn't easy for _me_ either. . ." He stressed, as she shyly looked away. "But tings happen. And I don't ever want you to feel like you can't talk to me about _anything_." Letting out a small chuckle, Gru added, "Even if it sends me through de floor. . ."  
Realizing he was reaching out to her, Margo looked up at him out the corner of her eye. "It's just embarrassing, that's all." she muttered. "Could you imagine what it was like to be working on a math problem, and realize you were starting your_period_?" There it was out in the open, just like that! Feeling the heat rush to his face, Gru cleared his throat and muttered,  
"No. . .I couldn't. . ."  
Now tears began to well in her eyes. "Well. . .I wanted to _die_. . ."  
Hearing how upset she really was. . .Gru suddenly found his own hang-ups disappearing. Turning more to her he gently replied, "Aww, hey now. It's not dat bad. It's all part of growing up. And a _very_ important function."  
"How could _this_ be important?"  
Knowing he was a step closer, Gru inhaled deeply and replied,"Because dat-is what helps you make de babies." he squeaked, as her eyes widened with surprise. "Dat. . .aaand _another_ thing. . ."  
"What other thing?" Feeling the heat rush to his face, Gru roughly rubbed a hand down the back of his bald head. Gathering up what nerve he had left, he weakly babbled. "The ting dat. . .happens between a man and a woman. You know. . .when dey- _uhhh_. . ."  
"Oh, wait a minute. . ." Margo interrupted. "_Ewww_. . .I know what you're talking about. I saw it on TV." Although blowing out a relieved sigh that he didn't have to go into detail, Gru realized what she'd said, and defensively threw a hand on his hip. "_Whose_ TV? Not _mine_, I hope!"  
"No, it was at Miss Hatties." She stammered, as he marveled at her. "When I couldn't sleep, I'd get up in the middle of the night and watched it in the office. Sometimes I'd come across that stuff by accident. . ."  
"Really? Well shame on her for not blocking dat!"  
"It didn't matter, cause I turned the channel. It was so _gross_!"  
Biting his bottom lip, Gru fought to keep a straight face. "Well. You tink dat now, cause chronologically on de outside you're steel a little gurl. But on de inside, you're tuorning into a young lady. And after awhile, you'll be looking at things a little deefrently. Including de _boys_. _Uggggh. . ._ Which I am _dreading_. . ." Gru replied, giving off a fake shiver. As she smirked at him, he folded his arms and nodded, "Still. . .Later on down de line, you _will_ start dating. And a lot of dem will have dat _one ting_ on dere mind. Some. . .will tell you anything you want to hear, to try and get dere way. But don't listen, Margo." He gently pled, looking into his daughter's eyes. "What dey want from you is very special, and shouldn't be given to just anybody. But should be saved for de right person. . .Preferably. . .your _husband_. . ." he boldly inclined.  
Completely riveted by what he was saying, her head slowly shook. "So. . .how will I know?"  
Her question had Gru thinking it over for a minute, until he was gazing into her eyes. "Because de the right boy will behave himself and listen to you, no matter what _he_ wants. When he loves you, he'll wait for as long as it takes. . . Understand?" Catching on, Margo shyly nodded. "Yeah. . .I think so. . ."  
Now just as quickly, the bobcat side of Gru emerged, causing his eyes to slowly narrow. "Good. . ." he diabolically hissed through his teeth. "Because if he _doesn't_, I'm gonna get my freeze ray and blast him _where it counts_!" Eyes widening, Margo found herself blushing intensely.  
"_Daad_!" She giggled, as Gru gave her a devilish grin.  
"Hey. . .I'm sorry, keedo. But I'm just a little protective where you're concourned. You may not be mine biologically. . .but you just as well be. Cause I love you just de same." He warmly replied, gripping the underneath of her chin. "And nobody's gonna disrespect you, or your sisters. _Nobody_!"


End file.
